Dealing with new family members

A few tips that can help you adjust to the new people and new family.

You have probably met your in-laws several times before the wedding but things are drastically different once you officially become a part of the family. Expectations abound.

Give love to receive love

Remember that a house is made of bricks, but a home is made of hearts. Be warm and accepting towards all family members and learn to overlook their faults. Care for them as you would for your own parents and siblings. Life will turn several shades more beautiful and satisfying when you receive that love back.

Earn their trust

Since you are the newest addition to the family, it is natural that all eyes will be on you. Be careful of what you speak and the way you conduct yourself. In the beginning, it best to be a keen observer and a good listener to familiarize yourself with the ways of the house. Avoid meddling in family affairs and don’t ask uncomfortable or awkward questions. With time, as you earn your in-laws’ trust, they will automatically open up to you and make you a part of all crucial family discussions.

Don’t be judgmental

It is likely that some members of your new family will warm up to you instantly, while others will take their time, so don’t be too quick to judge. It helps to meet everyone with an open mind and give yourself a fair chance at getting to know them. Who knows, that sour-faced aunt may just end up being your closest confidant!

Find ways to bond with individuals

The easiest way to adjust into the folds of your new family is to bond with each member at an individual level. Ask your husband what each of them likes and plan your moves accordingly. How about helping your father-in-law with gardening or accompanying your sister-in-law on a shopping trip? You can also offer to babysit your nephews and nieces so your brother-in-law can take his wife out on a date. Small gestures like these will warm their hearts and foster closeness.

Don’t criticize your husband’s family

Things are not likely to be hunky-dory all the time. There may be some things that you may not like about a particular person, but it wouldn’t be wise to complain about the same before your husband. Remember that all people are different and as a new bride, it is your responsibility to at least try and find ways to get along with them. Take all criticism in your stride and approach conflicts with dignity and grace. It may seem overwhelming at first, but it is definitely not impossible!

If at all you land in a situation that leaves you out of your wits, do talk it out with your husband and ask for his advice. Assure him that you genuinely want to have a harmonious relationship with everyone in the family, and he will be more than happy to help you out.