Remember when you first got married? You just could not get enough of each other, the attraction was magnetic. As time passed, responsibilities increased both at home and outside, kids were born and rearing them took up quite a bit of time. Somewhere along the way, the weight of daily roles and responsibilities weighed heavy. Not just that, there could be physical reasons too, the spouse could have gained weight or stopped taking care of the skin and these could bring down the physical attraction.
When Preethy* and Vinod* got married, that was the talk of the town. Preethy was a successful architect, pretty, articulate and successful, Vinod was a reputed lawyer well-known in social circles and handsome. Their marriage seemed to be a match made in heaven. The couple was looked up to but five years and two kids later, something seemed to be gnawing at their relationship. Preethy felt that Vinod who had been so fit when she married him now did not seem to care and had developed a pot belly, no longer was he as attentive to her needs or words as he used to be. Each day, she started to feel lonelier. It’s then that she came across a book on rekindling love and put the tips to good practice. Today, they are the loving couple they were at the beginning of their marriage.
Remember the days you used to dress up for your spouse? Get cracking and refresh your wardrobe once again. Indulge in clothes that make you look and feel good. We tend to be very visual by nature and a well-groomed appearance can go a long way in rekindling the love.
Go for a spa treatment together, it can help both of you relax and get some quality time together as well. Be lavish in your compliments to your spouse when your spouse dresses well, respect your spouse’s efforts at dressing up for you.
Communication in a marriage is very important to stay connected. When couples are in love or during the initial days of marriage, they tend to spend hours talking to each other and listening to each other. With the passage of time, you will find that both of you tend to take each other for granted. Spouses sometimes are guilty of tuning out and not listening when their partner speaks.
If you listen when your spouse speaks, it brings back those wonderful feelings of mutual admiration. If you have something about your spouse that disturbs you, bring t up and thrash it out, don’t let it simmer. Grudges, even hidden ones that lie beneath the surface can impact your marriage.
Flirt with your partner, blow kisses, tease your partner with your fingers and get physical. Sex is a magic ingredient that fills a marriage with life and vitality. It has nothing to do with age, many couples tend to shy away from physical intimacy as they children start growing up. Getting physical with your spouse is nothing to be ashamed of even as you grow older, indulge in it unabashedly.
Read up on intimacy, try out something innovative. Dress for the bedroom, ladies, get some sexy lingerie, men learn some new moves to mesmerise your woman.
A secret date has that allure of mystery. It also brings in that element of surprise that can keep your relationship feeling fresh. Book a candlelight dinner for both of you and spend time in each other’s company. The romantic setting can help bring back the memories and romance.
Plan a secret fun weekend for just the two of you. If you have kids, leave them with grandparents or relatives and set off. A beach vacation can be as great as a vacation in a hill station when you are with your beloved. This will be a time where you both can be yourselves without fear of being judged. Gift your spouse a new experience, it could be something like going on a wine tasting tour, trying a new sport and so on.
Sometimes the love between a couple can be marred by a conflict. In that case, it’s important to get to the root of it and set things right. For instance, if a wife is unhappy with the husband’s constant drinking, this could be a sore spot between both. They need to sit down and talk it out. Resolving this is one part of it and then both must agree on new rules for the future.
Instead of pining for love, become a source of love for all and your feeling of starvation will automatically dissipate. Mahatria explains this stance through a story.