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When mistrust comes in, love goes out. Trust is the main pillar of a relationship and if it’s damaged, it takes time to rebuild. But if you’re honest about the mistake and make every effort to seek forgiveness, the pain should heal faster.

You may have broken their trust while telling someone a secret you weren’t supposed to reveal. You could have unknowingly expressed what your partner said about someone. You could have not kept a date to go shopping or to the in-laws place, perhaps a second or third time.

Any of these could break your spouse’s trust in you. But there’s a way to redemption if you sincerely realise your mistake and seek forgiveness.

Acknowledge your actions to partner
The natural tendency for most of us when we make a mistake is to try and shift the blame on to someone or something. Nothing can make things worse in a relationship. If you make a mistake, take ownership of it. Acknowledging your mistake is the first step towards rectifying it. This will help both of you move past it.

Say sorry and seek forgiveness
Put your ego aside and say sorry. Make sure that your tone and body language show that you are sincere about the apology. Find out what you can do to make things better.
Address the questions your partner may bring up
When it comes to trust issues, your partner may have a lot of questions. Be patient with your partner, listen and answer each query. This would help a great deal in easing the tension.

Be patient till your partner gets over it
Trust once destroyed is not so easy to rebuild. It takes a bit of time. Allow your partner enough space and time to vent feelings. There might be times that your partner may get upset with you or cry… but be patient. Trust will not return instantly, it might take a few days or longer depending on the magnitude of the issue.

Take action to build trust
Rebuilding trust does not happen automatically and definitely not by merely uttering a ‘Sorry’. It needs to be followed up by action. Show your partner that you truly understand and appreciate them every day in small ways.

Keep up your word
Once you have made a promise, never fail it. Never ever break the trust. No more lies or excuses. This will make your relationship stronger.

Daya Kingston

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